Humour

Jokes You Can Tell in Class

Dad, can you write in the dark?

I think so. What is it you want me to write?

Your name on this report card.

An elementary teacher sends this note to all parents on the first day of school:
"If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school,
 I'll promise not to believe everything he says happens at home."

The difference between Knowledge and Wisdom:

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit.

Wisdom is not putting tomatoes in a fruit salad.

A wife returning from a fishing trip with her husband
was telling her troubles to a neighbor.
"I did everything all wrong again today," she said.
 "I talked too loud, I used the wrong bait,
 I reeled in too soon, and I caught more fish than he did."

When my daughter was three, we watched Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs for the first time. The wicked queen appeared, disguised as an old lady selling apples, and my daughter was spellbound. Then Snow White took a bite of the poisoned apple and fell to the ground unconscious. As the apple rolled away, my daughter spoke up. "See, Mom. She doesn't like the skin either."





  The boss always scheduled the weekly staff meeting for four thirty on Friday afternoons. When one of the employees finally got up the nerve to ask why, he explained.
"I will tell you why... I've learned that's the only time of the week when none of you seem to want to argue with me."

                

                                                                                                                 Mary and Joan were having lunch when Mary said "My son is really growing up."

Joan said "How do you know that?"
Mary replied, "Instead of asking me where he came from, now he refuses to tell me where he is going!"